The Six Habits of Highly Grateful People

http://upliftconnect.com/six-habits-highly-grateful-people/

Advertisements

Happiness is Found Here

In no era in history has the means of comfort and welfare ever been so within reach like they are today. Never has the knowledge of the world’s complex mysteries and the ability of subduing nature’s unfriendly elements ever been attained like it has today. Online shopping, laser eye surgery, electricity, central heating, the list continues. Despite these remarkable achievements, and in spite of possessing all the means for a better life, the goal of a pleasant life and happiness has never drifted further away like it has today.

The 21st century has taught us how to fly in the air like birds and how to swim in the oceans like fish, but many of us still do not know how to walk as happy and content individuals. And yet, when such an individual sits down to work out where the problem lies, he cannot pinpoint the problem.

Let us take a look at the life of a Muslim whose way of life has equipped him with a completely unique perspective which keeps him smiling at all times.

When cash is a little low, the believer is able to remain happy because he reads in the Qur’ān,

“And there is not a moving creature on earth except that it is upon Allāh to provide for it.”[1]

When somebody tries to degrade him, he is able to remain happy because he reads in the Qur’ān, “and dignity is for Allāh, His messenger and to the believers.”[2]

When he finds himself alone and without companionship, he is able to remain happy because he reads in the Qur’ān, “Do not be sad, Allāh is with us”,[3] and he reads, “Your Lord has not forsaken you nor does He hate you.”[4]

When he feels under threat and vulnerable, he is able to remain happy because he reads in the Qur’ān, “Is Allāh not sufficient for His servants?”[5]

When he feels no one understands him and no one is willing to listen to his problems, he is able to remain happy because he reads in the Qur’ān, “I only complain of my grief and sorrow to Allāh”.[6]

When any difficulty arrives at the doorstep of a believer, he is able to remain happy as he reads in the Qur’ān, “with difficulty is ease.”[7]

This is the peace of mind which Islām gives its people, just as the Prophet (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) said,

“How strange is the affair of the believer, as all of his affairs are good! If he is struck with goodness, he shows gratitude and this is good for him, and if he is struck with difficulty, he shows patience and this is good for him” [8]

Thus, if someone asks you to summarise the happy life of a Muslim, respond by saying: “Gratitude during times of ease, patience during times of hardship, and the gardens of paradise in the end.” This is the beautiful life of a Muslim we wish to share with the entire world.

The life of a practicing believer is one of unexplainable bliss because he is pleased with every one of Allāh’s decrees. Happiness cannot be attained in the least without firm belief in Qadar/predestination, it is a cornerstone to happiness. The Prophet Muḥammad (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) also taught us what to say in various situations.

When the Muslim wakes up in the morning, he has been taught to say:

All praise and thanks are due to Allāhwho gave us life after our dying and to Him will be the resurrection.”[9]

When the Muslim goes to bed at night, he has been taught to say:

“All praise and thanks are due to Allāhwho has given us food and drink, and given us enough and refuge, for how many people have neither.”[10]

When a Muslim puts on new clothes, he has been taught to say:

“All praise and thanks are due to Allāh, You clothed me with this.”[11]

When the Muslims exits the bathroom, he has been taught to say:

“All praise and thanks are due to Allāhwho removed harm from me and gave me wellbeing.”[12]

When the Muslim sees a person with a disability, he has been taught to say:

“All praise and thanks are due to Allāh who has spared me from what He has trialled you with and has favoured me over you and over many whom He has created a great favouring.”[13]

When the Muslim achieves a matter he wished to accomplish, what has he been taught to say?

“All praise and thanks are due to Allah, whom, by His favour, all good things are achieved.” [14]

And when a Muslim fails to achieve a matter that he wanted to accomplish, he has been taught to say:

“All praise and thanks are due to Allāh in all circumstances.”[15]


And so the Muslim finds himself shifting from one form of gratitude to another, from one form of contentment to another, regardless of the outcome or situation at hand.


In the absence of this mentality pains become unbearable, calamities become intolerable and life becomes like the one who consumes salty water; theirs is a thirst that can never be satisfied. Such a person finds himself desperately alternating from one avenue of sin to another, from one bed to another, from one drink to another, from one relationship to another, from one online video of obscenity to another, in desperate search for peace and lasting happiness, but his distance from Allāh only causes his heart to further tighten and his life to further darken. He craves to fill the gaps within his heart, but this is not how they are to be filled.

Imām Ibnul Qayyim said,

“In the heart of every human being, there is a sense of scattering which can only be gathered by turning to Allāh, and in the heart there is a sense of loneliness which can only be filled by being close to Allāh, and in the heart there is a fear and anxiety, which can only be removed by escaping to Allāh, and in the heart there is a sense of regret, which can only be removed by being content with Allāh.”

By looking at these examples, we discover something profound. We realise that true peace of mind and the fullest meaning of happiness is in one’s closeness to Allāh and distance from His prohibitions. It is that simple, as Allāh said,

“Whoever does good whether male or female and he is a believer, We will most certainly make him live a happy life.”[16]

And Allāh said,

“… then whoever follows My Guidance he shall neither go astray, nor shall be distressed. But whosoever turns away from My Reminder, then for him is a life of hardship, and We shall raise him up blind on the Day of Resurrection.”[17]

We can read all the mainstream theories, take every medicine on the shelf and try knocking on every door in search for this gem called happiness, but it will not be found anywhere except where the Creator of happiness has taught us to find it. That is because,

“It is He who grants laughter and tears.”[18]

We are happy; happy that we know Allāh, happy with Him as our Lord. We are happy that the Qur’ān is our guidance in life and that we have not been left at the mercy of the ideas of man. We are happy that we will be the first to be held accountable on day of Judgement and the first of all nations to enter Paradise.

 Source: www.islam21c.com

Notes:

[1] Al-Qur’an, Surah 11, Ayah 6

[2] Al-Qur’an, Surah 63, Ayah 8

[3] Al-Qur’an, Surah 7, Ayah 40

[4] Al-Qur’an, Surah 93, Ayah 3

[5] Al-Qur’an, Surah 39, Ayah 36

[6] Al-Qur’an, Surah 12, Ayah 86

[7] Al-Qur’an, Surah 94, Ayah 5

[8] Muslim, on the authority of Suhaib

[9] Bukhari, on the authority of Hudhaifa

[10] Muslim, on the authority of Anas

[11] AtTirmidhi, on the authority of Abu Sa’eed

[12] Musannaf Ibnu Abi Shayba, on the authority of Abu Dharr (Mawqoof)

[13] Musannaf Ibnu Abi Shayba, on the authority of Ibnu ‘Umar (Mawqoof)

[14] Al-Adkhaar of Imam AnNawawi, on the authority of ‘Aisha

[15] Ibid

[16] Al-Qur’an, Surah 16, Ayah 97

[17] Al-Qur’an, Surah 20, Aayaat 123-124

[18] Al-Qur’an, Surah 52, Ayah 43

10 things to *be* in the 10 days of dhul Hijjah

10 things to *be* in the 10 days of dhul Hujjah;

Today marks the beginning of one of the *best* days in the year! Alhamdulilah we lived to witness the 10 days of dhul Hujjah! 

The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
“There is no deed more precious in the sight of Allah, nor greater in reward, than a *good deed* done during the ten days of Sacrifice.” 

*Planning* increased acts of worship and good deeds like we do in Ramadan is essential to reap the multiplied rewards and blessings;

1. Be a Mukhlis taa’eb (*Sincere repentant*) someone who decides that today also marks the beginning of a new leaf in my book of deeds! 

2. Gain taqwa through *fasting*! If one can’t fast the 9 days; fasting the day of arafah shouldn’t be missed! (expiates the sins in previous year and upcoming one!)

3. Be charitable and love it more than you love money spent on anything else! know that you give yourself when you give to *charity*…it all comes back to you invested and in the best of ways! try giving daily in these 10 days (whatever you  can give!)

4. Enlighten your heart and soul with the words of Allah: Recite the *Qur’an* with reflection and a present heart… even if a few pages…

5. Humble yourself before your creator and make *dua* knowing with certainty that all you ask for will be answered! Write a list of dua (idea> 10 for the 10 days!) and recite these dua everyday as much as you can > in your sujood, driving, after salah, etc 

6. Be visible in the Sight of Allah when most are sleeping in *Tahajud / Qiyam*… Alone, with family or a group of friends – just like in Ramadan!

7. Be from the best of Ibaad of Allah; the ones who constantly *remember Him* (swt)… busy your tongue with thikr (and avoid backbiting at all costs!)

8. Be an active believer > *Help* those who need help in your community (visit a sick person, babysit a new mums baby or kids while she rests, cook dinner for a family grieving a death, comfort a person struggling with anxiety or depression, etc)

9. Purify your heart by forgiving those who you imprisoned inside it! Let them go… This is the best time for *forgiveness* and letting go (of how others should’ve been when they weren’t > leave everyone to their own journey…we are all flawed… forgive and be free)

 10. *Breathe and reflect* consciously everyday in those ten days daily and see how much this will reflect on your mood, dealings with others, khushu in salah, etc

May Allah accept hajj from those who are in Hajj now, forgive the ones who aren’t performing hajj, and facilitate and grant a hajj next year to whoever hasn’t been yet!

Optimism: I am as my Servant thinks of Me

The Prophet ṣallallāhu ‘alayhi wa sallam (peace and blessings of Allāh be upon him) said, “Allah, the Most High, said, ‘I am as My servant thinks (expects) I am. I am with him when he mentions Me. If he mentions Me to himself, I mention him to Myself; and if he mentions Me in an assembly, I mention him in an assembly greater than it. If he draws near to Me a hand’s length, I draw near to him an arm’s length. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed.’ ” [Hadith Qudsi]

Positive thinking is a great quality of any human being. In order to be stress-free and more effective, we will have to start thinking positively. Positive thinking does not mean that we should ignore life’s less pleasant situations. It means that our attitude towards unpleasant situations will be more positive and we will deal with them in a more productive way. We should think the best is going to happen, not the worst. There is a negative attitude that has spread across the Muslim world. If we have trouble finding a job, we will blame society around us for being racist. If someone is going through hard times, we will assume Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) is punishing them because they are bad Muslims. Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) says in the Qur’an at many places that we should always expect the best of Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He), meaning He subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) will have mercy on us and will relieve us of hardship. He subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) will forgive us if we seek forgiveness, will accept our repentance if we repent, will answer us if we supplicate, and will suffice us if we ask for something. We should call upon Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) while we are certain that we will be answered by Him. The mindset for us, and for our children, must be to fulfill our obligations while we are certain that Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) will accept our actions and forgive our sins and make our matters easier for us. So, whoever performs such a deed and believes and expects that Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) will not accept it and that it will not benefit him, this is despair from the Mercy of Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) and is from the greatest of the major sins. Sometimes we assume the worst. We start to think that we are deprived of our rights, have bad luck, deserve more than what Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) gave them, and it is as if they are saying: ‘My Lord has wronged me and deprived me of what I deserve,’ and our soul bears witness to this while our tongue denies it and refuses to openly state this. So, let us ask ourselves, are we protected from this type of mindset? This type of attitude is very destructive and we should try our best to keep our children from negativity and always think positive in all situations.

‘Abdullah bin Mas’ud raḍyAllāhu ‘anhu (may Allāh be pleased with him) said: “By the One besides Who none is worthy of worship, the believer is not given anything good better than his good expectations of Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He), and by the One besides Who none is worthy of worship, no servant of Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) expects good of Him except that Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) gives him what he expected, since all good is in His Hand.” [Reflections: Expecting the Best From Allāh, P.No:6]

Click to read more: http://productivemuslim.com

Our love of beauty a Sign..

Have you ever seen a dog stunned by the sunset,Or a bear marvelling mountains capped by snow?Or a camel enamored by a starry desert night, Or a bird breathless by the scenes it sees below?And if you’ve never seen a cat gaze fondly, in the eyes of another with resolution impressed,

then maybe something extra has been placed, in our souls, that is not be by evolution addressed,

For if we are animals just like all others, then why are our souls so easily captured,

By beautiful places and beautiful things, by beautiful moments enraptured,

May be The Beautiful made us and left, our love of beauty a sign,

that we believe in Him and recognize, that beauty points to the Divine.

~Ammar

Upbringing of Sons 

Guiding Principles for the Upbringing of Sons 
Upbringing of sons is a difficult and tiresome task . Many a parent suffer grief due to the transgression of their offsprings and are in agony because of it . 
In respect of this issue Ibn ul Qayyim al Jawzi [may Allah be pleased with him] comments : 
” Sometimes the grief faced by man due to his children is the expiation of some of his sins and nothing else ! Hence there is glad tiding for the one who tried to bring up his children on the ways preferred by Allah The Glorious and Exalted. And good news is for the one who endured the ordeal  of bringing up his children and it becomes expiation for his sins. So, if you experience fatigue in rearing of your offsprings seek from your Lord forgiveness of your sins ” .
Maqatil bin Suleiman [may Allah have mercy upon him] visited Abbasid Caliph Mansur the day of his pledge of allegiance. Mansur said to him:
“O Maqatil! Admonish me about something.”
To which Maqatil said: “Do I advice you from what I saw or from what I heard?”
Mansur said : “From what you saw.”
Maqatil said : “Listen, O Amir ul Momineen!”
“Omar bin Abdul Aziz had eleven sons and he died leaving only eighteen dinars out of which five dinars were

 used to shroud him, four spent to buy his grave and rest were distributed amongst his sons.
And Hisham bin Abdul Malik too had eleven sons. He left for each son inheritance worth ten lac dinars.
By Allah! O Amir ul Momineen! In just one day I saw one son of Omar bin Abdul Aziz giving away sadaqah in the way of Allah one hundred horses and I saw the son of Hisham begging in the bazar (markets)!!!”
When Omar bin Abdul Aziz was on his death bed people asked him,”what are you leaving behind for your sons?”
To which he replied :
” I have left behind for them Taqwa [piety/fear] of Allah The Glorious The Exalted, so if they are righteous, Allah The Glorious and Exalted is Friend / Guardian of the righteous and if they are otherwise, I shall not leave wealth for them which is helpful for them in the ways of disobedience of Allah.”
Point to Ponder:
People usually work extremely hard to secure their children’s future; striving at great lengths; assuming, after their demise their offspring will only be well and at peace because of the wealth. Whereas they remain ignorant of the larger security which is in the Taqwa [fear / piety] of Allah.  They don’t gift their children the piety which Allah The Glorious, The Exalted has mentioned in His book by saying: [And let those fear as if they had left weak offspring behind and feared for them. So let them fear Allah and speak words of appropriate justice]. [Al Nisa:9] 
When a man would see decline in the character of his son he would do sadaqah / charity, would feed people reciting this verse: [take from their wealth sadaqah to cleanse them and to purify them with it].

And would pray,”O Allah! this charity from me is so that my son develops purity in character because this distortion of his is more cumbersome/ painful for me than his physical disease would be.”
Similarly it is said about another person whenever he couldn’t do sadaqah due to his poverty and his son would annoy him, he would stand in nightly salah, recite Surah AlBaqarah and invoke saying:

“O Allah ! This is sadaqah from me. Accept it from me, and because of it, make him righteous.”
Turn towards Allah by worshipping him with the intention for the righteousness of one’s offspring . Even if they overcome your efforts still they are not able to overcome your intentions.
Our Lord! grant us from among our wives/ spouses and offspring, comfort to our eyes, and make us a leader/ example for the righteous.

Ameen .

-Ustadha Dr Farhat Hashmi